Somewhere over the Rainbow

This is the first thing I’ve written since being a school as long as a diary doesn’t count!
I won’t go into too much detail at this stage about myself but I have something important & special to me I’d like to share.
After loosing my daughter Hollie in 2012 as you can imagine having an empty heart & arms is hard to walk around with each day despite having other children one being my rainbow, but then I met a lovely lady who made cloth dolls.
I had looked into reborns before but shied away from the idea after negative comments however the cloth dolls were different, she had one who was beautiful & described her feelings like she had read my own mind it was weird I had finally met someone who knew what it was like, from then we became good friends.
I had chosen a beautiful little girl that fitted in with our family not something that looked like Hollie but all of my children with features from them all, she literally looks like mine.She made me a doll like hers but to match my daughter Hollie, they weighed the same, they look similar but different which is what I wanted, I decided to name her Rosalie which is Hollie’s middle name I wanted to have that link.

1780898_1409780272652443_639535827275425724_n 10474853_1409780415985762_7123216611495131563_n
She is in no way a replacement but an object that fills that hole just a little bit.
I remember the day I got her, I held her in my arms & it was like holding Hollie I felt amazing, I have her to thank for making that possible for me.

I have since then looked into reborns as I’ve seen the happiness they bring, I was recommended a lovely lady so contacted her with my situation & what I wanted, straight away she knew, she understood, she’d obviously done this a lot for mummies. She found the perfect one for me & I knew straight away she was it, the one I needed, she showed me others but that connection wasn’t there, so the saving began.

It’s been a few week since that day & my baby is paid off, made & ready to come home!
I got a message to say she’s done & my reaction would of got you money! My face went white & I screamed, a lot!! I think I even laughed at myself by this point along with letting my friend know the good news which she also found hilarious.
The excitement is killing me already, to have her in my arms & stroke her little nose.
It’s now the waiting time, it’s a good job I have children to keep me busy, I look at her progress pictures daily growing more fond of her, I have something else to focus on, something different than sorting dinner, the hoovering, all the normal daily duties that need doing, it’s nice.
She will be worth every penny.
I have named her Amelia-Rose, Amelia was a name we liked whilst choosing Hollie’s & also would of been a name from my rainbow if we had another girl & Rose to keep that link Hollie.
No she’s not real I know that, I have real ones that are my life but I don’t have my baby girl anymore.
They make me feel like It could be ok, I could be ok, I will get through this!

Here she is.

11233775_1628686420709417_3619067261239008668_n

 

I hope to contribute to the blog more and more so keep an eye out for my blogs.

natalie

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s